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It was so long, he needed the entire weekend to write the following line five hundred times: I will never look at my teachers with lewd thoughts on my mind. It was tough, but he finished the long assignment and turned it in on Monday morning. On Monday afternoon, she kept him after class again. This time, she had him stand right in front of her desk while she looked over his assignment. As she did, she counted every line on every page. When she got almost to the end, she stopped abruptly. He does not have a ‘BEER GUT’ - He has developed a ‘LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.’2. He is not a ‘BAD DANCER’ - He is ‘OVERLY CAUCASIAN.’3 ... He does not ‘GET LOST ALL THE TIME’ - He ‘INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.’4. He is not ‘BALDING’ - He is in ‘FOLLICLE REGRESSION.’5. He does not act like a’TOTAL ASS’- He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.’(Loved this one!)6. It’s not his’CRACK’you see hanging out of his pants - It’s ‘TROUSER CLEAVAGE.’This is likely a repeat but it is. ..”“Lori! Can you stop talking about it like that?” I yelled at her. My face felt as read as a beetroot; I could feel the burning.“So you don’t want to know how to give me orgasm after orgasm, so I moan so loudly I could be heard all over the house? You should have heard them after we got back from Hobart; they were at it for hours every night for a week!”She was making it worse; somehow I knew her parents must have sex; but it just didn’t seem right somehow. I had no idea how she could talk. After that, I'll walk Clara home." You can take her if you will be responsible for her. Larry, your papa and I trust you with Kate. We expect you to always respect our trust." I nodded that I understood. In a way it was funny. Clara and Kate did all sorts of things behind Kate's locked bedroom door, but my mother was afraid she'd get into mischief at a public movie theater. I went back to the phone."We're all set from here." Good. Put Kate on because I want to tell her the good news." I went.
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